I'm young and terrified that my life has run out of miracles, experiences.
​I don't know how to trust myself anymore.
It's been a while since I've truly felt ok, and I know others don't want to see this side of me. It scares them too. Makes them feel uncomfortable.
I guess I'm jotting this down, because I really hope I can prove myself wrong.

I dreamt that he held my hand and it was easy.
We were watching a movie of some sort.
​On a couch, looking forward, surrounded by young kids
He gently embraced my hand with his
Under the blanket
And though I hadn't known him for long
I hoped we could stay that way forever.

It was her last day and she didn't know it yet.
She had been quite unhappy for a long while, lost in the overwhelming blur of the future and feeling incredibly finite by the past.
It was her last day, and had she known, maybe she would have been happier in her ending moments: no future to run from and a past that would be rendered inconsequential.
A brief, weightless present she could truly feel and maybe enjoy.
It was the end of hinted potential but also a sigh of relief for the suffering always felt more real than any fading hope.