September 21st, 2019

LOG

• morning woke up feeling more grounded, trying to actively fight anxieties so that these last few days can be my new normal, kept sleeping until noon
• taking myself to the movies in the afternoon (feel good and cathartic)
• took a nap and didn't wake up in a panic
• saw Bree and Jenny for dinner, it went well (especially with the heartfelt moment with Jenny being there for me and the fireworks and the song); i'm going to dip my toes back into projects, hopefully this will be good for me/us
• eating so much food at night but trying not to feel guilty, eventually i'll do things that require me to be moving around a lot again

SKIN

• sandpaper texture is almost all gone
• a few small pimples on right side, one on left side, and one on neck (there have been 2-3 on my neck for a week) but they don't feel inflamed
• going to wear makeup for the first time in weeks (hope this doesn't agitate my skin)

WHAT HELPS

• subliminals
• being in contact with friends
• downloaded an anxiety app last night, i usually am resistant to the idea of cbt but i'm going to try it and see if it helps

FEELING

• i find myself slowly becoming more perceptive to listening to people and trying things to get better (a lot of them i previously dismissed so many times over and over again)
• makeup helps my confidence, i feel more presentable
• maybe i'll begin to start organizing my life/room soon, hopefully try to do it reasonably, not to entertain my anxieties