JANUARY 4

I say all the wrong things
Do all the wrong things
Feel all the wrong things
​A sensitive one amongst insensitive many
And it’s never their fault
I tell myself it’s always mine
My fault for not wanting to meet new people
My fault for wanting to stay indoors
My fault for being quiet
My fault for saying things people talk over
My fault for crying
And it’s so desolate in here
Because when I try to let it out, 
I realize how little it matters to them, 
And so I’ll keep it in, 
Because I fear the regret of letting it out more than I need the comfort of being told “it’s going to be ok”