A SPARK

8/7/19
"Don't need a response or anything but I'm walking to my car after just being lazy at a friend's place, the air is nice and cool, I hear cars on the street and the occasional music and convo from apartments as I pass by, and I have nothing I need to do but drive back home for an hour, I want to stay in this moment for a bit ✨"

​I don't know what I did to actually feel normal for once last night, but I did. All I know is that I didn't/couldn't give up. Here's what helped:

• extremely understanding friends
• the kindest anonymous listeners on 7 cups/warmlines
• 3rd week on antidepressants
• new dermatologist (i'm hopeful)
• staying out of the summer heat
• getting out of the house as much as possible
• the brain training game?

I know this is by no means over. I'm going to also start taking antibiotics and birth control for my skin so we'll see. I'm just reminded of what the one YouTuber said: "your only job is to not make things worse"