I have a lot of random thoughts floating around and I've been trying to piece them into one cohesive post, but, after deleting a few attempts, I don't think there is a puzzle to solve. I'm just going to force myself to commit to this one.
I've been having a pretty OK winter break so far. The initial optimism faded into stressing about my to-do list, film school, friends, and family, but now I'm trying to stop thinking so much. It's just a paradox of wasted time.
I finally finished the lastest season last night, and it was a lackluster end to a dark and beautiful series. No television show has made me feel this much anxiety and guilt all while exascerbatating my existing insecurities, so mission accomplished Charlie Brooker.
(p.s. food for my hungry eyes)
Distance makes the heart grow fonder with friends and family. I think I'm slowly coming to terms with that and it's ok. We always dream up amazing things we'll do together when we have the time, but when the latter comes, the former rarely does.
I've been gaining weight, and I've been throwing up. It's terrible and I keep telling myself I will stop. Sometimes I think I do it on purpose to feel something, but most of the time I'm bored. My thoughts consume me so I consume my surroundings-a lopsided equilibrium, but one nonetheless.
At the end of the day, I sleep to dream again
"I'm afraid so. You're entirely bonkers. But I'll tell you a secret. All the best people are."